An explanation...
... about yesterday.
A week ago, I would have had no second thoughts about putting up yesterday's post. But I almost didn't. Not because it didn't happen (from my point of view), because it did... but because now people know who it is I am referring to in the post, and I don't want them to get the wrong idea about him. Let me try to explain with a bit of a story.
This weekend, as has been blogged about completely about, I made a few statements BEFORE anything was said.
Example 1: When I broached TheHusband about meeting Spider, Sorted, et al for dinner Saturday night, I told him that he might hear about things I said here, and if he had any questions, to ask. This wasn't necessary (it turns out), but I also prepared him by showing him my first post.
Yes. It was a preemptive strike. I know. I was weak. I really wanted to go out to dinner with these people. I wanted to see if I (we) could make some new friends and have some new experiences, so that we could get past this homebody rut we've gotten into. And I wanted him to understand that I don't post negative/bitchy things about him, and he wasn't walking into an ambush of people who would hate him. Especially since I'd asked him NOT to read my blog.
Example 2: When I introduced TheHusband to all of the other bloggers, I quickly said to them "He doesn't read my blog, and he's never seen yours, either (as far as I know)."
In other words, don't talk about the time I mentioned that he was stretching his foreskin, or I posted pictures of his face after having some cancerous skin cells removed, or... you get the point.
Someone asked me why I had asked TheHusband NOT to read my blog. I told him the same thing I told TheHusband that one time he had, "If I know he's reading it, I might not be as honest when posting something." If I have to pick my words carefully, then what is the point?
Which brings me to last night's post.
I almost didn't write it. When I decided to, I chose my words carefully. I left out parts of the conversation. I finally hit "publish", and then changed it to "edit". Then I made a few changes, removed the option to comment, and hit "publish" again.
All because people who read this blog know who I am talking about.
A week ago, I would have had no second thoughts about putting up yesterday's post. But I almost didn't. Not because it didn't happen (from my point of view), because it did... but because now people know who it is I am referring to in the post, and I don't want them to get the wrong idea about him. Let me try to explain with a bit of a story.
This weekend, as has been blogged about completely about, I made a few statements BEFORE anything was said.
Example 1: When I broached TheHusband about meeting Spider, Sorted, et al for dinner Saturday night, I told him that he might hear about things I said here, and if he had any questions, to ask. This wasn't necessary (it turns out), but I also prepared him by showing him my first post.
Yes. It was a preemptive strike. I know. I was weak. I really wanted to go out to dinner with these people. I wanted to see if I (we) could make some new friends and have some new experiences, so that we could get past this homebody rut we've gotten into. And I wanted him to understand that I don't post negative/bitchy things about him, and he wasn't walking into an ambush of people who would hate him. Especially since I'd asked him NOT to read my blog.
Example 2: When I introduced TheHusband to all of the other bloggers, I quickly said to them "He doesn't read my blog, and he's never seen yours, either (as far as I know)."
In other words, don't talk about the time I mentioned that he was stretching his foreskin, or I posted pictures of his face after having some cancerous skin cells removed, or... you get the point.
Someone asked me why I had asked TheHusband NOT to read my blog. I told him the same thing I told TheHusband that one time he had, "If I know he's reading it, I might not be as honest when posting something." If I have to pick my words carefully, then what is the point?
Which brings me to last night's post.
I almost didn't write it. When I decided to, I chose my words carefully. I left out parts of the conversation. I finally hit "publish", and then changed it to "edit". Then I made a few changes, removed the option to comment, and hit "publish" again.
All because people who read this blog know who I am talking about.
Labels: Bloggers, TheHusband
posted by Mike at 10/18/2006 10:00:00 PM
6 Comments:
TheHusband is a wonderful man... just as you are. But you are both cursed with that terrible disease of being human... and it bites all of us in the ass when we least expect it.
I am happy that you trust US enough to feel comfortable to make that post... we know you two are just an old married couple!
One thing I've learned in my short time blogging is that a blog provides only a small glimpse into the reality of a person. I've been lucky to meet fellow bloggers so soon into my own blogging career, because that meeting helped me to see this more clearly.
Blogs are frequently (if not always) a place to vent. The people who read your blog know that, and if they don't, it is something they will learn.
My family knew about my very first blog, and when they read it, they told me how shocked they were and asked me to not write such things in my blog. I shut the blog down and started a new one that I didn't tell them about. They know I still blog, but I told them if they are not comfortable about what I write, then they shouldn't read it. This blog is for ME, not for them. They can read it if they want, but I ain't censoring myself for nobody.
You and TheHusband are who you are, and you're both awesome people, faults included. When you write about the little arguments you have, we who know you smile knowingly because we can imagine you two working through the issues.
Makes me wish we lived closer to you so we could get to know you better.
A lot of us understand where you're coming from and have no problem with it.
that's interesting.
Funny, the impressions and worries one creates in his/her mind on mere perceptions. They often make for miserable moments when in reality those moments should be ones of happiness, reflection, etc.
I read your post from the prior day, and it gave me no other impression than two adult individuals having their differences on any given day. You did table everything effectively and had the event been extremely hurtful, I am sure you would have used other language/references that would have suggested that to your reading public.
I have no less of an opinion of the Husband just because I have met him. He is a wonderful engaging person.
You are right of course, Dr. Tony.
Except, as I said, I changed some of the words, conversation, etc.
But thanks for trying.
Besides, the post wasn't about what happend, what he said, or what I did. It was about my trepidation in posting it.
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