Some peoples kids...

So, yesterday, I was standing outside enjoying the fresh air a cigarette, and my new co-worker, a 23 year old, walked out as I was clearing my throat.

He said: "You wouldn't cough like that if you'd stop smoking."

I said: "I wasn't coughing, I was clearing my throat."

What I should have said: "Mind your business, stop talking about some non-existent "ex" girlfriend that I don't believe you've ever had since I think you take dick up your ass each and every night, and remember that I started smoking before your father worked up the spooge of baby-batter that would eventually bring you into this world."

I do not like it when people feel the need to tell me how to live. My government does that enough.

One of my favorite episodes:

Of South Park.

The one where they see how many times they can say "Shit".

It's on right now. They include a "counter" on the bottom left corner of the screen where they count how many times their characters say it.

Funny Shit.
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Update: 162 times.

Funny:

Yesterday there was a pretty fierce really really big thunderstorm in the Orlando area.

All apologies to those outside the Orlando area.

This morning, during the 5:00, 5:30, 6:00, and 6:30 news, I was told about two (yeah, just two) house fires that were started by yesterday's lightning storms.

They spent about 10 seconds showing a fire on a house in Pine Hills.

For those of you outside the Orlando area, Pine Hills is a section of town that houses the poorer community of Orlando. Mostly Black, quite a bit of Latino, and a growing group of Asians.

Then there was the OTHER house fire they reported on. In Winter Park.

Winter Park (another community that makes up greater Orlando) typically houses upper middle class WHITE folk.

In this story, they spend quite a few minutes showing the damage created by the fires, how the owners had recently had the home built/upgraded. How the firemen spend SO MUCH TIME trying to save the house, and how the "homeowners" were going to have to live in a hotel for a bit longer. Oh. And there was an update to the story twice for every half-hour that they reported. Live. Really, there was a reporter doing live reports from the street outside the home in Winter Park, where it is requested that you "Please Drive With Extrodinary Care". Thank you very much.
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So I thought it was just me. And then I read the story on their own website.

Three sentences on the Pine Hills house. The rest of the story? The Rich Folks House.

Here's the link, if you don't believe me.

Dave asks, I respond:

Per his request:

It took more than five minutes, but ONLY because it's the most-used-drawer-in-my-desk at work. I give you:

My Top Left Drawer:

Company Deposit Slips
"For Deposit Only" stamp for checks (for the above)
Envelope for Petty Cash Receipts
"Received" stamp (for use in the "mini-warehouse" that I operate)
1/2 bag of pistachios (I get the munchies)
Black handled scissors
12" brown wood ruler
Hand cream (Have you ever heard of cardboard rot? It isn't pretty on the hands)
My smokes (duh!)
My keys (gotta put 'em somewhere)
1 box of small binder clips
1 fat yellow highlighter
1 not-so-fat yellow highlighter (I never use it)
3 extra copies of the office mailbox key (we've just moved, I might have mentioned)
1 tube Blistex (It's been there for 1-1/2 years. I never use it anymore)
My headache pills (just in case)
Two types of staple removers
An old picture of TheHusband and myself (you've seen it)
4 dimes
2 nickels
13 pennies
1 AAA battery
10 Black ink pens (I hate black ink pens)
4 Blue ink pens (The ones I use)
11-- 37-cent stamps

I have no idea what is in my bedside table, but I'm willing to share.

Want a giggle?

Go here.

National HIV Testing Day

Did you know it was today? I wasn't aware that we "needed" a designated "day" for it, but hey, whatever works.

Don't know your status? Want to avoid some of the crap we have to deal with?

Get tested.

You can find out for free, and anonymously (if you need to) by going here: www.hivtest.org.

You can put in your zip code, choose a radius of miles you want to travel, and voila! There are 28 places within 20 miles of my home that are giving FREE tests today.

Quick Post: Weekend

Didn't do much. Usual Sunday chores. Got mad at TheHusband. Twice. I don't think he noticed.

Her mom died (I don't want anyone google-ing her name and ending here...) Did I ever tell you my connection to her? Her dad and I used to have the same boss. I know, its a weak connection, but its true.

Her dad died, too. Sad, but one can't live forever, right? He was the same age as my grandfather, when he died.

I did get my haircut on Saturday. Pete, the barber, finally returned from vacation.

Late Anniversary Dinner

Not really. We didn't do anything to celebrate this year... maybe next year.

But tonight, since I didn't do any grocery shopping last week (TheHusband was out of town, and there was no need), we decided to go out for dinner after our weekly stop at Studz.

Since it's only three doors down, we went to Friends. Our Waiter was Jeremy, and we sat outside. We were the only couple sitting outside at the time. Patty Sheehan was sitting inside, with a woman (SHOCKING!!!), but I have no idea who the woman was.

TheHusband had the Blackened Fish, and I had the Grilled Salmon. Both, with asparagus. As usual, we traded bites of each other's dishes, and wished we'd ordered the other's.

We asked about the "All you can eat Crabs" on Tuesday, but Jeremy said it was packed, so we'll probably skip that. Too bad. I love crab. I spent too many years in Maryland NOT to love crab.

We might have spent $40 between the two of us, and I tip extremely well, so if you are in the neighborhood and want to eat... I'd suggest it.
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Would someone PLEASE tell Daisy Lyman (D-Orlando City Council) that if her mid-thirty-year-old son is calling her in the middle of the night because he was pulled over in one of the best known drug selling neighborhoods of the city by a white police officer, that calling it "racial profiling" is probably NOT the best way to make it go away? Also, BTW, if I were said 30ish year old man that called my mommy to get me out of trouble, I would be too ashamed to run for County Commissioner, and Juan Lyman should probably take note.

Just a thought.

Doctor Visit... June 2006

Yesterday, I returned. Not bad, but not great, either.

T-Cell count: Up to 212. Yay for me.

Viral Load: Also up, to 1018. Bad news, but not insurmountable. Doc thinks that I may have been having a bad day, or I could be starting to resist one or two of the meds that I've been on for a while (before and after the self-imposed med-holiday). We did another VL test yesterday, and in three weeks if it's higher, we'll do a Genome test to try and figure it out, possibly changing my meds. I'm thinking that going to the shots is a possibility. Yuck.

BP: Way up. She took it three times before finding something low enough to put into the record.

Weight: The same. Stupid scale.

I did mention that I've noticed that EVERYONE lately has had a higher Viral load, and asked about that. He said that they've changed the test, making it different. This calls into question all those months (years?) of undetectable tests we've all been given. Of course, alot of the bloggers that have noticed this do not go to the same lab, so they should ask about this too.
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I think I'm coming out of my funk. It's a depression I've been under, more than your standard funk. Usually, once I realize what it is, I can work on it and get over it. My mantra is that I don't want to take another pill (for depression), so that reminds me. I think I'll be fine.

On that note, thanks to Gina (again), Steve, and Joel (who doesn't seem to have a blog).

Thanks to TOS

Over at "Chasing the Wonderlust", we have this little audio clip.

Good comedy writing doesn't happen everyday.

Julia was always my favorite character.

Yesterday was number 14

Happy Anniversary to TheHusband and myself...

Of course, he thinks it is today.

Yeah. I'm still here

I just don't have much to say. Actually, I have a lot to say, but nobody really cares, so what is the point?

Thanks to Gina for asking.

I turned off comments as my first step towards deleting this blog.

I am still reading all of your blogs, and quite a few more. Daily reads haven't changed.

Kathy Griffin is on. Need I say more?

Somebody misses her Daddy already...

... in fact, she is either protesting the fact that he is going out of town, or trying to get herself packed in the suitcase. I'm not sure which.



TheHusband left this morning for a trip to Chicago. Oh the drama.

TheHusband is never on time. I may have mentioned this before. In fact he's missed more than one flight, and has caused me to miss the flight for my brother's (2nd) wedding. I don't DO late. At least not very well.

This morning, I moved up our departure time (from the house), without telling him, so that he would make it on time. It worked. Even though his "checked" baggage was too heavy, so he panicked, before realizing that he could re-distribute the weight and still make his flight. Which he did.

Carpet Muncher

Saturday, while I was out buying groceries, I stopped at the local Tuesday Morning.

There was a carpet that I had my eye on for the living room. Sisal with a brown border. I thought it would be perfect for our living room area. Not that we sit there, ever, but because it matched the furniture.

Besides, I've mentioned that I HATE the tile floors in this house.
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I think one of the cats likes it, and I haven't even rolled it out yet.

This picture was taken within 10 minutes of me bringing it into the house.



And I've caught her there 10 times since. She loves it. I think she's realized that her coloring matches it.

Moving Day and Moving Day Plus One

Sorry. Took a blogger posting hiatus this weekend. Let's see if I can remember Friday, since it was so long ago.

I got there at 0800, sent an email out saying that we were losing phones and internet access (to remind everyone in the company - again) and shut down my computer and pulled the plugs. I had already emptied my desk into two boxes the day before.

Movers arrive at 0930. Two of Latin decent (one CUTIE), one immigrant from Israel (this isn't important). They discount the hourly rate right away, probably because there was supposed to be four of them. And then they move stuff. And move some more stuff. At one point, I was down at the new place and got a call on my cell phone from my supervisor. They were about to pack some boxes (that they provided) and were going to charge us $150 to pack six boxes. I told him to tell them to hold off, and I'd be right there.

Armed with a copy of the quote, I said no way. Packing boxes was included in the quote, and charging us $25 a box was completely unacceptable, since I'd asked how much "boxes" might cost (prior to the day of the move) and hadn't received an answer. Back and forth, back and forth, and it was determined that they would NOT be packing any boxes for us, we'd move the smaller stuff with our company van. Screw that.

Other than that little surprise, I thought they did a good job. Of course, If they'd picked up a stack of similar boxes, loaded them in the truck, unloaded them at the new place in that same stack of boxes, I would have felt better about it, but that didn't happen. Everything was stacked against the wall as it came off the truck. If "item A" was a box 3x5x5, then it was placed on the floor and "item B" was a .6x1x.6 box, it was placed on top of "item B", instead of a tower of "item A"s next to a tower of "item B"s. Did that make sense?

Goofy SalesGuy showed up. His only responsibility (other than his office/desk) was to remove the pictures from the old place, get them to the new place, and hang them AT the new placed. He showed up long enough to move the pictures that I HAD REMOVED and GATHERED in his car to the new place and PLACE THEM IN THE NEW PLACE. He said something to me about showing up, and I said "No need, we could have done without you". He pointed out to me that he'd been "selling product" all day. I asked if he'd brought a check, as usual. He said no, so I replied, "If you didn't bring a check, then you should have been here, and since you weren't, you are useless to me today, and you may as well leave." Someone piped up from the peanut gallery and said "Gosh, Mikell, tell us how you really feel." My response was "Do not step to me next time you need something and say it's for the good of "Team Orlando", as that phrase has lost it's meaning as of this moment.

If ANYTHING defines "Team Orlando", its moving from office to office. All hands should have been on deck from dusk to dawn, as necessary.

Lunch time rolled around, and the company provided. Actually, I did, using Petty Cash Funds. Pizza, of course, for a group this size. THIS is when I found out that one of the movers was from Israel. All of the pizzas I ordered had some sort of pork product on them... shoot me already. I didn't know. He picked off the pepperoni and ate the pizza plain. A man after my own heart, adapt and overcome.

They'd moved everything by 1530 or so. Then the very little stuff was left. Trash cans, tossing the leftover trash from the old place, other piddly stuff. I was still there for an extra hour that day. --Remember, my company frowns on me having overtime. They can't bill a customer for it.

Oh. Salesgirl showed up sometime during the afternoon and unloaded a box or two out of her car. I have no idea what, I couldn't get over the fact that she was wearing high heals and a cocktail dress. In black.

Saturday, TheHusband and I went to Home Depot to pick up some parts, and then went into work. He installed three electrical outlets so that people could connect their computers to, you know, electricity. Myself included. Two hours (of my time), not billed to the company. I tried to find the items for my desk so that I could work on Monday, and hung pictures in the office so that it would LOOK like we were open for business. Common areas: Done. Rest of the building: Not so much. Also, didn't charge the company for TheHusband's work, just the parts needed.

(I should also mention that TheHusband designed the layout for the new office, all five (count 'em) versions of it. At. No. Charge.

So then there was today.

My mission was to create order out of chaos. It wasn't easy, and I'm not actually done yet. Maybe by next Monday. I'll be patient.

But I had to find a product for install today. I didn't know the install was today, as NO ONE HAD TOLD ME. Fine, see this? Install it. I don't think it is the right product, but see THAT PILE OF PRODUCT? I think the right stuff is somewhere in there. Until I brake that all up, I don't know what else to tell you. If, sometime today when I sort through all this stuff I find the correct product, I'll call you.

I hated making that call. It was in the last box I put my hands on. Of course.

Also, this: "Where are my scissors?" Uhm, I don't know. Did you pack your desk? "No, someone else did." Oh. Then ask "someone else" where they put them. Of course, had you been here to pack your own desk, you'd KNOW where they were, wouldn't you?

Next: "I can't print to XX printer." Really? Neither can I. In fact, I've NEVER been able to print to XX printer, so I'd suggest calling the IT department, not me.

And: "Can I borrow your scissors/stapler/whatever?" You could, but I've been too busy trying to make sense out of this office to FIND THE BOX THAT HAS THESE ITEMS IN THEM, so no, you can't, as I don't know where they are yet. Remember, my thought process is "Team Orlando".

What? There isn't any toilet paper / paper towels in the bathrooms? Find the box.

You don't know where to throw out your trash? Find a trashcan that was moved from the old office and place it by your desk. Then you'll have a place.

Bitches/Bastards, all of them.

Call from the landlord's agent: "What are you doing about the shelves you left?" We discussed them. You said you were going to demolish the old office, walls and all, and I said we weren't taking them because of the way they were built and we wouldn't be able to break them down and put them back together in the new place.

Insert snippy comments from Mikell to landlord's curmudgenly 63 year old agent. End phone conversation (me adding in some stuff that was not complete prior to move in).

Next, I find out that the curmudgenly agent called the CEO, and having to swallow my pride and apologize. It was deserved, of course, I should not have taken my day out on her... but I'm still right.

There were other things, and I can't remember them all.

At the end of the day, someone said something to me (probably kidding), but I'd had enough. I gave in.

I grabbed my keys and my cigarettes, closed the open programs on my computer, and walked out the door. Without saying good-bye. I always say good-by to whatever worker is still there, everyday without fail.

I didn't feel guilty about it until I started this post, three hours later.

Out of Order

Blogrolling seems to be down, so I can't see any of the sites on my blogroll.

Such a headache.

Not what I have right now, which I do, but I'm talking about the preparations for the office move tomorrow.

One person didn't show up, to busy "selling" something, I'm sure. (Unexcused) Other salesperson? Sat in her office. (Unexcused) One Service Technician had an install, way out of town, and took the new guy. (Excused times 2) The other Tech did help, labeled equipment so that when brought to the new place can be placed together, but when he packed his desk, he only did the items on top of it, nothing in the drawers. How does one say, in Spanish, that they will have to flip the desk on the side to get it out of the building- thereby redistributing all of the contents therein? (Excused) Two Project Managers? Nothing. Nada. Zip. (Unexcused)

CEO (was in the office for the day) did try. He said he didn't care about anything in the desk, but see above comment about said contents of said desk. I went behind him after he'd left. He DID tell me, nice guy that he was, that he'd tossed a bunch of stuff he was sure he wouldn't need in the new place, and that I could toss -- pause for effect -- the stuff on some book cases, since he'd never used/touched them since he started coming to this office.

The person who's ONLY responsibility was to remove the pictures/posters from the wall and re-hang at the new place? He's the guy I mentioned first. No Show. So, while I am doing that, my phone is ringing off the hook. "Can you close this call for me? I tried calling [someone at corporate] but she wasn't at her desk," said a technician from our South Florida Office.

"Yes, I could, but that would stop me from: removing pictures from the walls - including the little nails; removing the contents from each and every desk in the building; gathering the things in the kitchen into one area so I can then place them in a box for transport; defrosting the refrigerator; washing the dirty coffee pot and mugs; packing the equipment and other supplies; boxing up the contents of the office supplies cabinet; and of course labeling each and every item of furniture so that the movers know where to put it in the new office, since I'll probably be here packing more boxes while they are moving everything and can't be in two places at once. AND NOT ONE PERSON IS HELPING ME DO ALL OF THIS!!"

Sure. I didn't say all of that, but for a minute, I thought about it. He got the idea, and decided it would be better to leave a message for someone at corporate to close his call.

At 16:15, I gave up. "Let Go, Let God" is what my mantra for the next 15 minutes was. If it gets done, it does. If not, then not.

Regardless, I have SUCH a headache.

I've tried to keep the costs down, but the cooperation is just not there. The movers will pack boxes and unpack boxes, will break down and re-assemble furniture, etc. But if they SUPPLY boxes, then they will charge over and above the hourly rate. I have no idea what they charge for boxes. It could be $10 per each.

The moving company has to be paid in full before they empty their truck. I am so dreading making that phone call.

Live Blogging Let's Make A Deal...

I'm late into this, but here goes.

8:05: Lance Bass should have the person that picked out his costume fired.

8:17: Leslie Nielson is not looking well. Look at his face.

Your chance to win is coming up. I don't even know what that means. Hell, I don't care.

8:21: TheHusband just walked passed my den (he's watching it in the other room) and said one word. "Lame". I have to agree. How long is this show tonight? Maybe I should have stuck with All My Children on Soapnet.

8:25: Paige Davis. Will she do a strip-tease for extra money? Has Paige ever seen this show before, or was she too busy at dance class?

I just realized. This show is a graveyard of out-of-work actors. Talk about a light bulb moment.

8:33: Tim Meadows. Is he still alive? "Officer Krupke"? Funny, the ONLY black guy in my high school production of "West Side Story" played Office Krupke.

Ricki Lake has lost quite a bit of weight, hasn't she. Her voice, however, is still just as shrill and annoying as always.

What is with the flames on that refrigerator? Who'd want that in their kitchen? Ugh.

Paige. Please give that scared little dog a break and give her to a crewmember.

8:49: Big Deal Time. It had better be.

I'm glad I didn't choose that Dining Room. Yuck.

Lance did NOT look like he would enjoy sitting next to Brandi. Whomever she is.

An African Safari? No thanks.

That's it. I'm done.

And I'm seriously considering deleting this entry, as it was too embarrassing to admit that I'd watched.